One common mistake beginning writers make is throat-clearing. In literary terms, this means “coughing up” words before getting into the story. Writers who do this load lots of information, details, and wordiness in the opening page before anything actually happens. Doing this in the first draft is fine, but during the revision process writers should work to get rid of it.

When writing an opening, think about a favorite movie. What was its opening scene? How did it hook us? I mention movies because it’s one of the main forms of entertainment we writers compete with. Consider books too. Study their opening lines and paragraphs. Do they hook us? Sometimes when I visit a bookstore, if I’m not familiar with a certain book’s author, I’ll read its first page. If the first paragraph or so doesn’t grab me, I don’t buy it.

Although there are many ways to begin a story, the best way is the action opening. This opening begins in medias res. That is, in the middle of the action. It can begin with something spectacular, such as an earthquake, or something seemingly innocent like a knock on the door. It can also include dialogue, though this isn’t a requirement. We must either see a character in action or hint at something that’s about to happen. Also, be sure to mention your character’s name as soon as possible.

In my novel, Squire, A Mascot’s Tale, a dog story set during the Civil War, I didn’t clear my throat by writing long stretches of preamble before the story begins. I began in medias res instead. Let’s look at the book’s two opening paragraphs.

Excerpt from Squire, A Mascot’s Tale

“Well, I’d sure as sand say he is going with us.” Jesse Webb sauntered down the wooden steps of his father-in-law’s brick furniture store.

His wife folded her arms, her emerald green hoopskirt spanning its slatted walkway. “Oh, no, he’s not. Besides, how could you take the most popular dog in Coughlin? He might get killed.”

Analysis of Squire, A Mascot’s Tale

• Main characters introduced: Jesse, Jesse’s wife, and the dog. By the sixth paragraph, we learn the dog’s name (Squire) as well as the name of Jesse’s wife (Rachel).
• Setting introduced: the town of Coughlin.
• Conflict introduced:  Jesse and Rachel arguing over Squire.
• Danger introduced: I hinted at danger for Jesse and Squire when Rachel says, “What if he gets killed?” Later, we’ll learn what the danger is—Jesse is taking Squire to war as his   regiment’s mascot. Because mascots were common among soldiers on both sides of the Civil War, this storyline is believable.

We’ll look further at openings in the next post.

For anyone interested in purchasing Squire, A Mascot’s Tale, it’s available for purchase on The Author’s Cove Bookstore.

Three characters don’t crowd a story’s scene, not even four. But I’d be careful not to have too many in one scene because it can make it harder for readers to follow.

So, what happens when a third character enters into a dialogue scene? He/She can deepen the scene’s conflict and/or spin the story’s plot a different direction.

Dialogue– The Third Character

Bill sighed. “Now where are you going, Alice?”

            “Back to the grocery store.” Alice snatched her purse off a chair in the den.

            “Again? Today?”

            “A woman’s got a right to shop.”

            “Not as much as you do.”

            “Well, humph! I forgot to buy eggs.”

            “That’s just an excuse. The eggs can wait.” Bill settled back on the couch and grabbed the remote. He flicked on the television to the sound of cheers—a football game. “Where else do you plan on shopping?”

            Alice jerked open the front door; she gaped at the visitor, George Taylor. Smiling, she let him enter.

            “Hey, Alice! Your knight in shining armor has arrived.” George spread wide his arms as though he wanted a hug.

            “I asked that woman a question,” Bill said.

            George slid his arm around Alice’s shoulders and they embraced. “Your sister happens to be my little lady.” He winked at her. “Hey, what’s happening on the idiot box, Bill, my man?”

            “Cowboys and Giants. First quarter.”

            “Aw, Georgie-pie. My little brother here watches ESPN too much.”

            “I already told you, Alice. I’ll quit watching sports when you quit shopping all the time.”

            “That’ll be the day!” With a hearty laugh, George steered Alice outside to her car.

            Stupid George. Bill upped the volume on his television in time to watch the Cowboys score a touchdown. He couldn’t let those two get married.

Observations on Third Character Dialogue

• Conflict. I used lighter conflict, but the issue of Alice’s shopping remains the central focus.
• Surprise. While some readers may have thought Alice and Bill were married in the previous dialogue, the arrival of George reveals that Alice and Bill are siblings. Thus, I used an element of surprise here. Readers enjoy getting surprised.
• George. I showed his personality through dialogue. Instead of taglines to reveal when he’s speaking, I used beats. Taglines are fine, but don’t overdo them. The same goes for beats, for too many beats can become a distraction. If dialogue is well written, readers should be able to know who is speaking without having to rely on such literary devices. So, use them carefully, and strategically, throughout the dialogue scene.
• Bill. In the last paragraph, I italicized Bill’s direct thoughts. We’ll discuss direct thoughts later in a future post.

Yes, this wraps up my series on dialogue, at least for now. Hope everyone found something useful in it.

“Where are you going?” Bill asked.

            “To the grocery store,” Alice said.

            “Why are you going again?’

            “I forgot to buy eggs.”

            “Will this be the last time you’ll go today?” Bill sat on the couch and flicked on the television with his remote control.

            “Yes.” Alice grabbed her purse.

            “Well, goodbye then.”

            Goodbye.” Alice walked out of the den.

Oh, wow! What’s happenin’ in this dialogue? I mean, what’s goin’ on? Man, is this boring or what?

Yes, it’s boring. Why? Because it has no conflict or significant action, and we get no sense of who Alice and Bill are as people. We must work on these things in this next revision step, and continue working on them no matter how many revisions it takes. If we’ve written their biographies and have come to know them well, this will make writing their dialogue a little easier.

My Revision

“Now where do you think you’re going?” Bill said.

            Alice snatched her purse from off a chair in the den. “Back to the grocery store.”

            “Again? Today?”

            “A woman’s got a right to shop.”

            “Not as much as you do.”

            “Well, I forgot to buy eggs.”

            “Oh, that’s another one of your stupid excuses. The eggs can wait. The hens’ll lay more of them tomorrow.” Bill plopped on the couch and seized the remote. He flicked on the television to the sound of cheers—a football game. “Where else do you plan on wasting my money?”

            Alice jerked open the front door.

            “I asked you a question, woman.”

            “I’ll answer it when you quit watching ESPN all the time.”

            “I’ll quit watching sports when you quit shopping so much.”

            “A woman’s got a right to shop.”

            “Yeah. I’ll be shredding your credit cards tomorrow, woman. A man’s got a right to watch sports.”

Observations on Revision

• Conflict: Conflict doesn’t always have to be physical or verbal, but in my revision I  decided to have Alice and Bill argue.
• Characterization: We learn something about Alice and Bill. Based on this excerpt, Alice may be a shopaholic because Bill complains about her “wasting my money,” but we  aren’t sure yet so we need to keep reading. Bill, too, may have a problem. He may be a    sports addict because he watches ESPN all the time. Again, we’ll have to keep reading to   find out.
• Three questions advance this story: (a) After Alice leaves the house, Bill threatens to shred her credit cards. Will he follow through with this threat? (b) If Bill does follow through with it, how will Alice react? (c) Do Alice and Bill have addictions that cause  problems between them? If so, how will they resolve their issues?

Their conversation, then, sounds natural but it also advances the plot and reveals something about the characters, which is what dialogue is supposed to do.

Yes, I did forget to mention something–beats!

Beats

Definition:      A beat is an action a character does that adds to a dialogue’s impact and tells us something about the character. Beats should be carefully considered for each  character in the story, not just thrown in to take up space.

Example:        If a character is insecure, beats should reveal that insecurity. How would an   insecure person behave in different settings and situations? Some insecure people hide their  insecurities by bragging, whereas others may be shy. How would a braggart  behave at a party, for instance, if the braggart is insecure? How would a shy, insecure person behave in a party? Not all shy people are insecure. Some folks just have a quiet nature and don’t talk a lot—it’s part of who they are. Perhaps the same could be said about braggarts as well.

My Beats

• Sighing. Bill is either worn out physically or emotionally. Or, he may just be frustrated. Or both. We’ll need to read further to find out.
• Alice snatched her purse. Alice is either angry or in a hurry, depending on the story’s context. When she slammed the door we see that she’s probably more angry at Bill than she is in a hurry.
• Bill plopped on the couch and seized the remote. Bill’s pretty upset with Alice, too.

See how these beats are put in the right place and how they work? Also notice they can be used to replace taglines. One of the literary trends these days is to avoid taglines and only use beats, but for what it’s worth, I disagree with this. Just like taglines, though, be careful not to overdo them, inserting them after every piece of dialogue a character utters because it gets distracting.

If the dialogue is well written, with every character having his/her own unique speech rhythm, pet words and expressions, etc., we won’t need to use too many of either. When we do use taglines and beats, however, use them in strategic places on the page.

Well, cat, we’ll get in that in my final post. Now go catch a mouse !

Does an author’s dialogue look like it’s easy to write? It does? Good, because that means the author worked hard on it. In this series, I’ll share some basics of writing good dialogue.

Most professional writers are familiar with the expression “Show, Don’t Tell.” This comes from the great Russian writer, Anton Chekhov, who said: “Don’t tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass.” 

One of the ways we “show, don’t tell” is through dialogue.

The Purpose of Dialogue

• It should sound like real conversation.
• It should reveal something about the character.
• It should have conflict, either major or minor.
• It should be interesting.

Poorly Written Dialogue

“Where are you going?” Bill inquired.

“To the grocery store,” Alice answered.

        “Why are you going again?’ Bill remarked.

       “I forgot to buy eggs.”

       “Will this be the last time you’ll go today?” Bill sat on the couch and flicked on the television with his remote control.

       “Yes,” Alice said with conviction in her voice.

       “Well, goodbye then.”

       “Goodbye.” Alice walked out of the den.

In future posts, I’ll critique and revise my “ho-hum” example. For now, let’s look at some basic principles.

The Basics

• Direct dialogue is when a character speaks. This goes inside double-quotation marks.
• Punctuation that ends a character’s dialogue goes inside the closing quotation marks.
• Each time a character, a new paragraph begins.
• When the speaker is identified, such as “Bill inquired” or “Alice answered,” these identifiers are called taglines or speaker attributions.
• When a character performs a physical action(s) in addition to dialogue, these action(s) are called beats.

I committed several dialogue mistakes in my example. Can you spot them? We’ll discuss them in more detail tomorrow.

Fortunately, numerous resources are available to help us. Two of them are: Writer’s Market and The Christian Writer’s Market Guide. Also, such magazines as Writer’s Digest and The Writer.

I recommend subscribing to one of the magazines I mentioned. Not only do they offer great writing instruction, they also publish interviews with agents, editors and authors, provide contest information and deadlines, publicize conferences, and similar things.

Also purchase one of the aforementioned current market guides. They provide contact information, publisher website information, the types of things they publish, and how much they pay (if they do). Study the guide, find a publisher you’d like to write for, then visit its website. From the website, download its writer/author guidelines.

Print the guidelines and follow them perfectly. Some magazines will want a query letter first whereas others will want the entire manuscript. Each magazine has its own format for authors to follow.

Regarding magazines, purchase a copy or else ask the editor to send you a sample. Sometimes they’ll send you one for free while other times, an author may have to buy a copy. Once you get it, study it.

Tips for Studying a Magazine

I’ve never been a fan of success seminars. For me at least, they’re a waste of money. Most attendees get excited and “pumped up,” ready to take on the world. Then, within days or weeks, this feeling abandons them and most return to their same old habits. I know, because that’s happened to me. It may not be true in all cases. However, I have a sneaking suspicion that in the majority of cases, it is.

The thing that’s helped me more than anything else in my writing career was what my father taught me: quitters never win. I’m thankful for this lesson. It’s seen me through many rough times in my life as well as in my writing.

To become a professional writer requires pit bull determination. So what if an editor or agent rejects our manuscript? That’s part of the business. Many famous writers experienced this: Isaac Asimov, Theodore “Dr Seuss” Geisel, Agatha Christie, Zane Grey, John Grisham, and Madeline L’Engle, to name a few.

Yet these authors and others, passionate about their craft, persevered. Whatever we do as writers, no matter how many times we get rejected—do not quit.

When we receive such responses, are we tempted to toss our hard work into the trash? Or delete it from our computer files? Or both? Don’t do it. Many of history’s greatest writers got them.

A Few Famous Writers and Their Rejections

• John Grisham: His first book, A Time to Kill, was rejected 25 times before it found a home at Wynwood Press.
• Madeline L’Engle: Her classic work, A Wrinkle in Time, won a Newbury Medal, Sequoyah Book Award, and Lewis Carroll Shelf Award, but publication didn’t come easily. After 26 rejections, Farrar, Strauss & Giroux published it.
• Irving Stone’s bestseller, Lust for Life, suffered 16 rejections.
• William Golding’s Lord of the Flies was rejected 20 times.

True, poor writing is one reason for rejections. Poor grammar, spelling errors, weak content and subject matter all lead to them. However, don’t take rejection personally. As we’ve seen from the brief list above, even the best written novels and stories get rejected. Editors and agents have other reasons for rejecting a manuscript, and these have nothing to do with the quality of an author’s writing.

Rejections are not a rejection of us. Harper Lee, author of the famous work To Kill a Mockingbird, once told Writer’s Digest magazine: “I would advise anyone who aspires to a writing career that before developing his talent that he would be wise to develop a thick hide.”

Other Reasons for Rejection

• The publisher just purchased an article or book on the same topic.
• The book’s subject isn’t marketable.
• The writer didn’t follow the publisher’s guidelines.
• The writer didn’t study the periodical publication or book publisher to determine its audience and the sort of things it needs.
• The editor was sick, tired, or in a bad mood and thus, rejected everything that day.

Dust off your laptop, put fingers to keyboard, and go at it again and again and again.